she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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