I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
