brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
