just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
