brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
