is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
