If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
