We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
