i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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