i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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