Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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