I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Too much gin, very little bucket
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize