talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize