yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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