the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
