The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
