She said her name was "party"
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
