I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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