YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You need a sexual gate keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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