The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize