Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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