he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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