yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
