do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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