People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
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i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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