I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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