the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
