return my video game
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
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