Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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