Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
