Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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