I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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