So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
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I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
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I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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