Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize