you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
