They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
