Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
