How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
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