my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever