how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
