she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize