Texts From Last Night

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  (904): View more from Florida

  Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.

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  (904): Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight. http://tfl.nu/aofb
  Replies (11) Good night (696) Bad night (3711)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?

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  (303): If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom? http://tfl.nu/ym23
  Replies (24) Good night (691) Bad night (4385)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.

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  (604): the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick. http://tfl.nu/jjwi
  Replies (27) Good night (6481) Bad night (658)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump

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  (843): At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump http://tfl.nu/qbro
  Replies (23) Good night (646) Bad night (4444)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate

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  (812): Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate http://tfl.nu/9bko
  Replies (23) Good night (975) Bad night (4144)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  she told me i tasted like america

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  (206): she told me i tasted like america http://tfl.nu/ed46
  Replies (31) Good night (7871) Bad night (1210)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??

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  (201): dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her?? http://tfl.nu/1hfi
  Replies (8) Good night (1081) Bad night (3861)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?

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  (785): My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test? http://tfl.nu/em8d
  Replies (9) Good night (1014) Bad night (3933)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.

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  (517): I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole. http://tfl.nu/6med
  Replies (3) Good night (1045) Bad night (1837)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse

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  (+61): Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse http://tfl.nu/nf0w
  Replies (3) Good night (1262) Bad night (613)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.

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  (859): if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it. http://tfl.nu/6uvx
  Replies (10) Good night (2726) Bad night (561)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.

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  (612): Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report. http://tfl.nu/1t2g
  Replies (4) Good night (1550) Bad night (362)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings

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  (845): I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings http://tfl.nu/ny97
  Replies (12) Good night (787) Bad night (921)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me

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  (614): you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me http://tfl.nu/5ifz
  Replies (4) Good night (590) Bad night (345)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter

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  (807): i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter http://tfl.nu/p7cr
  Replies (2) Good night (312) Bad night (386)

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