I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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