I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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