escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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