You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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