I think my fart just growled at me.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Then you guys just all showered together...?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
