He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize