Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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