goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
