so let's talk penis.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize