Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
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She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
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Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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